sappy notes to an actor

my parting sappy manifesto for ...:

get the support you need to dig really deep inside yourself
it's not easy work, but the pay off is huge
unconscious living is not living
don't sabotage yourself
and if you do
be kind to yourself, cause we all do it and then spend the time it takes to figure out why you did

follow your bliss

and if you don't know what that is
then what you are doing is finding out what your bliss is
and it changes all the time
(often you will find it from having to transform yourself in order to
serve someone/something you love...)
assume it will be hard

if something scares you, then that is the right direction to go
in some form (the non-self destructive form is best...
so think before you leap, there are 72 different ways to do it, guaranteed)
pick one
and go that way with faith and extreme self care
relax, cause you will fall big
and you want to fall softly,
laugh loud, get back up
and keep going.
Find some good jokes to tell on the way... write them yourself
based on the falls (cause there will be many)
learn to pray (a version of falling) and dance alone in your room with the lights out and really good music three time a week!

notes to a young solo show creator Apr 2011

-personalize the writing... politics don't enter people, someone TOUCHED by something real and painful does
-don't preach at us... we will shut down... get us to join you in something you care about and assume we also care about it
BUT - this is important- first we have to care about you (the character)
and than means specific details that are idiosyncratic not general

- the audience are all people affected by the illness you are addressing... in some way

ask these questions:
1) what are you healing in yourself with this piece?
2) find one other real person you care about who is dealing with the same issue TALK TO THEM AT LENGTH
3) who is the group suffering from this? Then there must be books- read them
4) how does this affect everyone (The children of, mothers of siblings of, friends of... and voila you have everyone...

NO ONE is outside any issue worth address ing on stage... if they are you make it a freak show and it loses universality

be brave PERSONALLY and then we will trust you politically...

another note to an female actor Mar 26/2011

redefine the feminine as powerful, athletic and energetic

don't buy the old fashioned unhealthy garbage about it

READ, read some feminist stuff, read some stories of female heroes, find some female mentors that are sexy women AND have powerful physical practices (most of the working actresses do by the way! They have to!)

Read theatre, read plays by women, read novels by women, take yourself into other cultural physical environments...

take yourself into areas you may not usually go...
Indian dance, (even just a few classes), Chinese acrobatics, Hindu street festivals, latin music clubs... change up the rhythms you listen to

take a week and only listen to music that is new to you and if you start listening to something and you don't like it
LISTEN TO IT ANYWAY

and have some fun... in the woods, in water... let nature nurture and teach you

slow down sometimes and just be... don't move all the time
find the movement that is so deep and profound in stillness

notes to an actor Mar 26th/2011

A student asked me some things she can do over the summer:

-yoga classes or walking in which you are actively work on awareness work without worrying about emotional connection (relates to the awareness work in the emotional connection work I teach)

- as you are reading plays and playing with possible monologues for Theatre Ontario, play with character bodies, animals you can research... in fact
go to some zoos and really study some animals that you feel could stretch your range/and or serve your hit

-play with gesture... get to know your own, copy your parents, go for walks or go to parties and watch gestures... give yourself a goal to come home with 10 gestures that you can copy

-do some emotional culture homework... how do your parents handle anger? tears? joy? get what they want?
what does this tell you about yourself? your brothers? Your more distant relatives? any mentors/guardians in your life? people you grew up emulating?

-watch movies intelligently- watch several movies with the same actor - what character body choices did they make? how much did they rely on costume? accent? text? time period? status? watch a movie MANY TIMES... stop it at certain moments, rewind and watch a section again and again

notes to an actor who is hard on herself

in the end you will be further ahead BECAUSE you have the skill and discipline to BUILD the container
as well as learn how to fill it

just because some of the work as an artist at times focuses on
'just be there'

does not mean that a well crafted container is not important

it just takes time to get BOTH

think water and a glass

I hand you the water in a glass

without the glass
I can't get you the water
it's messy and self indulgent

if i hand you an empty glass
well
that's obvious

sometimes we are learning how to make the glass
and when water is around... it is very hard to make glass

sometimes you are learning how to trust the water... and even understand what it is and how to recognize it
is this clean water? is this coolaid? maybe I need juice or coffee...

but it feels sometimes very different than making the glass...
and well
trying to get the liquid into the glass!

yikes... you have to start with a wide open simple container...
to catch all that good stuff

then you can start to narrow the container... refine the glass... what is the best glass for juice? wine? coffee?

notes to a depressed actor Feb 23/2011

I would say write a lot of unfinished poems, draw some faceless self portraits
and maybe there is something deeper or different, rather than nothing there
maybe you don't want to finish it the way you used to... and don't know what's next...
that's GOOD! and hard...

take a step back and take some time in the studio (somewhere private) to
a) have fun
b) be truly alone and do whatever you need to do

out of the studio...
c) go walk in a cemetery... what is really important to do before you die... talk out loud to yourself, to some dead people...
Abe Lincoln did it... you'd be in good company
d) take yourself somewhere you have never been before (a Korean grocery store, a Chinese herb store, a Hindu temple... ask some good questions, put your foot in your mouth)
e) watch some really funny movies... stupid ones... Bill and Ted's big adventure, amazon women on the moon... something so bad it's good
f) read a biography of a great artist/scientist/activist who was persecuted and also got it wrong at times... Van Gogh is always a good one
but look for someone new for you

sounds like you are hitting that normal place as an artist that we all hit
over and over again... if you can get through it once
congrats... it will be back
bigger and badder every time
and the pay off?

a new you, a new form, a new adventure... moving forward, death of the old self, birth of the new
death is not easy
but it happens every year- go look at the trees now- in the cold... touch them...

gravity and performance

I really think the simplest things take the longest to learn. We use terms like-
get grounded, he's in his head, she's riding high, they were off the floor...

The simple act of breathing to stop adrenaline and feel gravity is so easy to do and therefore to forget to do. I asked my chiropractor what I could do to support the work she was doing... she said- if I tell you what you can do, you will think it is too simple- and you won't do it... I asked anyway

what?

Take time to breath and drink water.

And she is right, that is hard to do, because it is so simple.

'I (God) am closer to you than your life vein' says Baha'u'llah

This great gift- gravity- is right there, every moment and I take it for granted... the gift of my heart beating and the sensations in my entire body are right here with the floor... now, anytime I need it, I can feel the floor hold me- not an abstract idea, but real sensation of gravity... my best lover, my most trustworthy and supportive friend... it holds me unconditionally and I ignore it, think I can handle things on my own... SUCH AN ILLUSION!!

true foundation - another note to an actor

In my various notes to students lately, i am finding that if i read them as messages to myself, I learn a great deal... today I sent a message to a student in response to a report assignment - it is their monthly evaluation of how their own physical practice is going. So far my 4th year acting students have been writing very well though out examinations of their practice. One student, however, wrote me a brief statement... more or less: I failed, I am disappointed, I will try again.

This students work has felt a bit in a lull- something familiar to us all and I wrote back:

I would encourage you to take a deeper look at your process. If you are not able to get to the work you had planned, then maybe the work is to ask yourself WHY?

Are you:
depressed
angry
rebelling
lack work ethic
afraid of success
afraid of failure
over tired
sick
in the wrong work
uninformed

If you are happy with the way things are then maybe none of these things are true- but if you are not- are any of these things resonating? If so- then this is the work... adjust your practice to INCLUDE addressing this issue.

If the building you are creating keeps collapsing, then you need to examine the foundation... it can be very hard to tell oneself the truth

Without truth, you cannot grow...

notes to a student regarding how to stay alive during long still times on stage

keep the tension fluid- neither always fully relaxed- or always held
think of the stillness as very active- and maybe give yourself a very long term engaged task
look for the someone in the audience who is... fill in the blank with something really compelling for yourself
the person who I do not know now- but who will be one of my best friends for life... something fun and that provokes you to FEEL and therefore move internally...

In any case, your internal viscera- should be shifting and this will hopefully help make the stillness more alive- also really remember gravity and how much it constantly is changing- don't go numb to gravity- you are still moving, as you always are- but it is just more delicate- great meditative practice!